It’s okay. We can slag off Luis Suarez as much as we want, because he knocked us out of the World Cup. That’s what we do best; we’re not great at defence; you don’t want to see England in a penalty shoot-out, but complaining about the championship after we’ve been knocked out?! Forget about it – you may as well play our national anthem now.
During their game against Italy, Uruguay’s forward took what the manager said and practiced it; “I want you boys to go out there; give it your all and sink your teeth into the match”.
Not content with a starter and a main, Suarez saw Italian defender Girogio Chiellini as the ideal end to his three-course meal. Sure, we feel bad for Chiellini – that must have really hurt; I mean, having normal-sized teeth dig into your bare flesh would be sore, but Suarez’s?! Sheesh – but if it wasn’t for that event, we wouldn’t have the below.
I like retro gaming. I like the World Cup. And I love the clever computer-nerds who coined up this Pac-Man inspired video game. I don’t even know why you’re still reading this: click on me to play the game, already!
And if you’ve still stuck around; firstly, thank you, and secondly, check out our bite-less Italia tees.